Bad Dreams

Earlier today, I took a nap.  I woke up in a sort of frenzie, and couldn’t get myself out of bed.  Since this blog usually relates to childcare, I’ll provide this connection:  You know how sometimes children wake up, and they are just scared/put out, and you have to rub their back and remind them that it’s okay, everything is all right?

I never outgrew that.

So usually I call someone and have them talk to me. Just hearing someone’s voice knocks me out of the illusion that I’m alone, that I have something of which to be afraid.

Today, I called a friend (an every losening definition) who loves to talk. Really, usually you can just glance at him and he’ll talk.  That’s good enough but there is the added benefit that he’s kinda funny, so I called him. And I asked (demanded) in my frenzied state that he tell me about his day.

He responded (actual quote) “I’m probably not the best person to call. I haven’t done much today and I just made dinner, and it’s hot. I’m sorry. I don’t mean to be so selfish.”

I’m not blasting this guy. Really, I acknowledge that it’s kinda using someone to call them just to hear their voice, so you’ll feel better. And that’s not okay.  But there are some people I feel okay doing it to because I know they love me. (That’s not why I felt okay calling him. I felt okay calling him because he likes to talk, so I saw it as a win-win.)  And I acknowledge that those were very valid concerns. A) He thought he had nothing to contribute B) he had another, time-sensitive commitment. Very rational. But hurtful. Why hurtful?

Like I do, I started relating this to my relationship with the Lord. How I never have to worry that he’ll tell me to call someone else, and yet never is he the first one I call. I don’t trust him to answer.  And then this song popped into my head, with lyrics that say, “You’re love is better than chocolate, better than anything else that I’ve found.” And while this, I think, is a totally inappropriate raising of the value of chocolate, it became a fun springboard.

God’s love is better than:

the guy on the other end of the line actually talking to me

wireless internet (i had to drive to mcdonald’s to post this)

the changing of the leaves

sledge’s hugs + d’s hugs …ooh that get’s me thinking.

The laughs of every child i love. ho dang.

What’s your “God’s love is better than…” ?

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